In my family, everyone seemed to collect A’s like stickers. My siblings, cousins, you name it! I always felt like I was in a never ending race to catch up. It wasn’t because I didn’t try. Honestly, it often took me twice the effort to reach the same marks they got in their sleep.
The Malaysian education system pushes kids hard from a young age. Exams like UPSR and PT3; those real ‘pressure cooker’ moments of childhood, made learning less about curiosity and more about chasing perfect scores. When your self worth depends on exam results, it’s easy to feel like you’re falling behind, even when you’re doing your best. I lost sight of my own student happiness in Malaysia a long time ago.
And yes, the UPSR and PT3 exams have been discontinued as a measure to remove this stress. However, the mentality that you need to excel is still very evident, whether it’s from class rankings starting in Standard One or familial expectations. In many families, parents are a key reason for this because they compare results among relatives and friends. You can probably think of that one pakcik at every family gathering, asking if you’re getting A’s in class, even when you’ve barely finished your nasi lemak.
The 3S: Stress, sleepwalking, and “safe” careers
I still remember the pressure hitting me in Standard Two. I was sick for a whole month but had to sit for my end of year exams anyway. Imagine this: me, burning with a 40°C fever, locked in an isolation room with a rubbish bin beside me in case I got sick during the test. The math paper asked, “What is 37 minus 23?” Like the whole world would fall apart if eight year old me couldn’t answer that. When results came, I placed fifth in my year. You’d think I’d be proud. But what I remember most was how normal it all felt. Looking back, being ranked and judged at eight is so crazy to me.
Looking back, being ranked and judged at eight is so crazy to me.
The academic stress didn’t go away. A couple of months ago, I actually sleepwalked to my desk, opened my textbook, and started writing notes in my sleep. The notes weren’t even legible, but that shows how deeply stress had taken over my mind.
We’re often told to choose “safe” careers, ones that promise financial stability. As someone who didn’t grow up rich, that path seemed like the only way forward. If you step off it, people say you’re “wasting potential and money.” But do we ever ask: Will this make me happy? Conversations about careers often focus on money, not student happiness or personal joy. I used to set crazy goals, thinking success meant never slowing down, always climbing, always doing more.
When burnout hits you like a ton of bricks
Earlier this year, I hit a wall. I just couldn’t get out of bed for class. For someone who loved learning, it was terrifying to feel so numb and unmotivated. That semester, I got my first ever D. A few years ago, that would have shattered me. (Okay, it still stings as I write this). But mostly, I was too burnt out to care.
I’d been chasing goals I didn’t even believe in anymore. Goals that looked shiny and impressive, but weren’t real to me.
The worst part? I was studying a course I genuinely loved. But love alone wasn’t enough when I was running on empty. I’d been chasing goals I didn’t even believe in anymore. Goals that looked shiny and impressive, but weren’t real to me. That made me realize how fragile student happiness can be when we’re always trying to prove ourselves academically.
Admitting I wasn’t okay took time. But I started talking to friends. I asked for help from teachers. I learned to say no to things I couldn’t handle, the ones I used to say yes to just to look “successful.” That was the start of healing. I began to untangle my self-worth from exam results. I still want to succeed. I still have big dreams. I’m nowhere near them yet. But now, I chase goals that make sense for me, instead of ones that only look good on paper.
Student happiness in Malaysia shouldn’t be a luxury
We all need permission to slow down. To unlearn that our value depends on achievements. So, take a moment to sit down and think, what if we chased happiness, not just success? For me, happiness looks like choosing rest without guilt, setting goals that come from joy and building a life where learning feels meaningful again. Because after all, it’s a privilege to be a lifelong learner.
Dream boldly. Reach for the stars if that’s what you want. But also dream gently, because student happiness in Malaysia matters.
In Malaysia, we’re told to aim high. And that’s good. But dreaming big shouldn’t cost us our well-being. True success is more than grades or prestige. It includes joy, peace, and self-worth. So yes, dream boldly. Reach for the stars if that’s what you want. But also dream gently, because student happiness in Malaysia matters. Not just today, or when you hit rock bottom, but every ordinary day you’re here.
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